Dr. Dan Gallagher Talks to Parents

Dr. Gallagher began his talk by differentiating between self-concept and self-esteem and noting how self-esteem relates to performance success. Praise alone does not necessarily increase self-esteem. In fact, frequent praise has the effect of the praise giver being seen as a nice person and the praise itself being discounted as irrelevant. Specific attention to detail is more effective than "good job."

Dr. Gallagher emphasized stabilizing a crisis situation before engaging in problem solving. “All problems are resolvable or can be changed – especially when broken down into manageable pieces.” He urged parents to focus on specific behaviors and lay out steps, then identify desirable attitudes to accompany the desired behavior. For example, “You seem to recognize how important it is to stay on top of things. You want to do well in school.”

He pointed out that stress is not necessarily all bad, in fact, a modicum of stress is motivating. Too much stress becomes distress, but exposure to moderate stress helps increase coping skills. Avoiding stress altogether often “grows the stress.”

Dr. Gallagher peppered his talk with many examples and took the time to field questions from the parents. In all it was an informative morning.

Daniel H. Gallagher, Ph.D. is a licensed psychologist in independent practice in Maplewood, NJ for 19 years. Dan has extensive experience working with children, adolescents, parents, adults, families, and couples in community based agencies as well as private practice. He emphasizes a positive approach of building on strengths